The telling or writing of family stories is crucial to me; that’s why I agreed to write this foreword. This is a simply written, straightforward, but captivating book, even for people not in the Bender family—and that is the whole point. The story of Nevin and Esther Bender has enough touch points with U.S. culture and recent history to have universal application for many of us. Moreover, it has enough specific similarities to thousands of Mennonite families growing up in the 1930s, ’40s, ’50s and ’60s that I have no doubt many will find the simple (although formally written) pages quite compelling. The beauty of this book is that it was originally conceived and written by family, for family. But almost anyone born in the larger Mennonite faith family in the 1950s or earlier will find points of identification with the Bender story. In fact, I was amazed at how many experiences my family shared, even though we grew up in Indiana, in a much smaller farm family of three girls and one boy, in an (Old) Mennonite (not Conservative Conference) church, with Dad "just" a deacon and not a bishop. The stories of Nevin’s youth reminded me of similar stories I heard and the issues we faced in our church and family, such as a child run over by horses; young Titus left behind all alone at home; jumping dangerously off of barn beams; canning together; children asking forgiveness for an alleged wrongdoing they couldn’t recall; stories of Dad being chosen by the "lot"; spending Sunday mornings and evenings plus Wednesday evenings exactly as we did in our family (always at church, always kneeling for prayer Wednesday evenings). Where the Bender story intersects with the larger cultural and historical story of the U.S. experience, I found my interest piqued even more: Here was a family that actually challenged the state rulings on reciting the pledge of allegiance, resulting in children being suspended from school and the formation of the very first Mennonite elementary school in the U.S., Greenwood Mennonite School, Delaware. Here was a son who lived just four blocks from Ebenezer Baptist Church in Atlanta, where he heard Martin Luther Jr. preach frequently and became an integral part of the civil rights movement. Then came the years when the Benders experienced the pain of the civil rights movement, in part at least for their beliefs in the equality of all people, including the original Native Americans. A church they founded in ministry with the Choctaw peoples in Mississippi was burned and rebuilt not once but three times. This was at the time of similar racially incited burnings all over Mississippi. The Bender family story intersects with and perhaps even subtly impacts the national story—probably more than most of our stories do. But the overall larger impact of this story and book is the way Nevin models, at least in this telling, the grace of a conservative Mennonite leader growing older, wiser, mellower, and able to embrace not being able to figure out every single aspect of Christian faith. While Esther plays a key supportive and loving role as wife, mother, and helpmeet, the book and its authors do not pretend she had a leadership role she didn’t have, since this was a different time in history. I appreciated the insights into my own faith heritage brought by this family story, such as the major difference between Amish and other Anabaptist groups being the Amish insistence on a bishop’s authority versus the Anabaptist understanding of the importance of the "priesthood of all believers" in decision-making. This key understanding became critical in one of the main crises of Nevin’s life, when he was essentially asked as a leader to coerce the wearing of the plain coat and he was not inclined to do so. Eventually Nevin basically recommended that a new bishop take over to break the impasse, and the Benders wisely moved on to new areas of service and challenge in God’s kingdom. Perhaps this book will also inspire other families to in some way write or record part or all of their family stories. Like the Benders, you will find that you will come to new insights, understandings, and serendipities—and that your family will be changed even in the process of gathering, writing, and reading. If so, then the circle of inspiration will be complete. —Melodie (Miller) Davis is a writer/producer for Mennonite Media in Harrisonburg, Virginia, and editor of the Together and Living periodicals for Shalom Foundation publications. She is the author of eight books and the "Another Way" syndicated column. Without the Loss of One orders:
|
|||||||
| Click here to explore joining InnerCircle readers club and receiving occasional updates and special discounts. | |||||||
