Every age group in society has a defined role and function—except older adults Each age group has its work to do, generally understood, well-rehearsed, well-researched, embedded in the journey. Even if the mark is missed, each age group has some sense of what it is supposed to be doing. People spend up to a third of life preparing, a third producing and gathering, then they retire. For years we have chased the question of what to do in the third age, unsure how to handle it partly because once life ended before the third age could begin. For some this is still true. Years ago at a conference in Mexico I told of a new model for finding meaning in that third age. A mature woman, skin weathered by hard physical labor, said through an interpreter, “In my country we work to survive.” Many of us know of those whose faithful work was sustained by dreams of later-life leisure which was then cut short. Still, the last century saw an extension of life expectancy from about mid-forties to mid-seventies, adding two or three decades to the years between the end of a career and the final end. The script no longer ended at age sixty-five or younger. This is the “border crossing” Katie Funk Wiebe probes on behalf of all of us and herself. With her we cross the border from her career to retirement and are blessed as she weaves in glimpses of where she has been and wonderings of what she might become. Wiebe’s life has been marked by the vivid imagery of border crossings not only from country to country but also through the pains and joys that have accompanied her journey. As she tells of these crossings, she succeeds in expressing her mind and emotions, her faith and her uncertainties. I thoroughly enjoyed and benefited from Wiebe’s book. We need more of this type of sharing of experience and thinking about how to handle the post-career years. What can be the purpose of that third age? What is God’s plan? These are questions raised by reflecting on Wiebe’s reflections. In Genesis, at the end of each act of creation God declares the act good. There is no suggestion the warranty must expire at age sixty-five. Here we are some 35 million strong over that age, with 76 million boomers set to join the ranks of the career retired over the next twenty-five years. Unfortunately, these walking libraries of human experience and knowledge are turned loose on the street as underused or misused resources. Their gifts are all too often discarded by a society who just doesn’t get it or by the older persons themselves when they assume they are valueless. What will it take to turn such attitudes around? In recent decades those who have pondered these issues have developed clues regarding our third-age callings: 1. Grandparenting and child-rearing are significant roles for many older persons. In our disconnected society over 2.4 million children are being primarily raised by grandparents. Some estimate that as many as 18% of all children are raised to some degree by grandparents. This amazing statistic, along with the many young adults returning home to parents, is sometimes referred to as “unplanned parenthood.” But help in rearing the young can be a wonderful benefit of the later years. 2. When third-agers return to modest paid service jobs, this not only supplements waning income but often provides the work force with a warm, human dimension. Retirees make valuable contributions as school crossing guards, second career managers/helpers in nonprofit organizations, friendly greeters in stores, minimum wage clerks, and much more. 3. What would the future look like if we developed research on the legacy third-agers would love to leave? What might we learn about elements of life worth perpetuating, those significant happenings we pray will flourish beyond our lifespan? No one puts on a tombstone, “I should have spent more time at the office,” or “I spent 10 minutes a day with my son” or “I told you a month ago I love you.” But legacy includes more than how we use our time. It involves valuing another. It is a commitment to acts of kindness every day. It has to do with integrity and reliability. Concern with the legacy we leave broadens our worldview and includes care for our neighbor, worldwide. 4. Once most volunteers in America were women not working in the formal labor market. With the increase in two career families, retired persons have become the largest pool of volunteers. Many volunteer opportunities are still designed as an extension of the energy of an employed staff person. It is unlikely that level of service will be sufficiently fulfilling to the volunteer to qualify as adding great purpose or meaning to life, Volunteerism needs to be more centrally valued as the gift of ourselves to others which in turn fulfills our need to be needed. 5. One way to think of
of older adults is as society’s healers and helpers.
Perhaps as part of this and as evident in Wiebe’s
reflections, to manage the border crossings we need a
well-cultivated faith in the God who created us and
accompanies each phase of our journey, from its first to
its third, when older adults seek clues to what aspects,
requirements, gifts, and wisdoms of this stage belong
uniquely to us. Finding our way through the third age is
more art than science, as we balance describing what we
see with bringing into reality what we believe in and
hope for. On this journey, as the author eloquently says,
“We frequently need a rock under our back
wheel.” Border Crossing orders:
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