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She Called Me “Sir”

She called me “sir” today, as I was picking out roses for Valentines’ Day. This happens . . . not that often . . . but it happens, so I’m used to it. But today for some reason it bothered me.

I certainly don’t blame anyone for thinking I’m a guy—I do tend to dress that way, and I do have the short-cropped hair styled more like a guy’s hair than a girl’s. Look at the picture and you can see it too, the “sir” you might mistake at a glance.

So why today is “sir” not rolling off with a chuckle? Because it’s not me. Inside I am woman, girl, female. I am so proud to be a woman, so thankful to be a woman, so honored to be a woman.

Yet I often dress like a guy because somehow that resonates with me. I feel strong, confident, beautiful, sexy in those clothes. I feel authentic in those clothes. But it doesn’t mean I don’t still feel like a strong, confident, beautiful, sexy woman.

I can’t explain it, but somehow I feel even more woman when I dress in the clothes that suit me . . . even when they’re boy clothes.

Still on some days I need to dress to the hilt in totally “girly” clothing, trading the faux-hawk hairstyle for a gently feminine side-swirl, adding an extra layer of makeup (including lipstick), finished off with a light scent of Hugo “Deep Red” for women instead of my standard Burberry “Touch” for men.

We are complex beings, we humans. Gay, straight, or somewhere in-between, we are all complex, beautiful human beings. And today I’m reminded that we don’t need to figure it all out—for ourselves or for anyone else.

Starla J. King

—Starla J. King, Ashburn, Virginia, is a garden designer, writer, and photographer.  She co-owns Signature Gardenscapes, LLC (www.signaturegardenscapes.com) with her life partner Sandy and enjoys the creative freedom of blogging at http://starlajking.wordpress.com.

       
       



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